Sometimes I stop,
ponder,
wonder,
what were my hopes and dreams?
When did I start living and worrying,
day-to-day,
day-in-and-day-out,
forgetting about the grandiose plans,
what I wanted to be?
Now I want to remember, but can't.
Somehow my mind is blocked,
me blocking me,
the soul of the soul,
captive to lesser me thoughts,
groveling at the bottom of the barrel,
wondering when it will all change.
Thinking small.
But,
God does have plans for me.
What are they, when will they be apparent to me?
Where does my heart have to go to find out ?
More journey?
Enjoying more of my now,
so I can be given different or more?
Perhaps,
Can I quicken it somehow?
Perhaps,
It is time to give up my will,
surrender to the unknown,
mirages of hope,
that turn into waterfalls of knowledge,
that will develop into faith.
It is time.
RDC
8/6/2010
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